peacefare.net

OK Santa Claus, here’s what I want

I’m hoping it’s true Yemen’s President Saleh is coming to the U.S.  As that eagle-eyed young journalist Adam Serwer tweeted:  “not to prosecute him…would be, u know, awkward.”  That set me thinking about other good fortune that might come our way this Christmas eve:

1.  Syria’s president Bashar al Assad decides he really wants to practice opthamology in London.

2.  North Korea’s “supreme commander” Kim Jong Un wants to see professional American basketball so much he decides to give up the nuclear nonsense and buy an NBA team for Pyongyang instead.  Lots more prestige and very lucrative.

3.  Iran follows suit, abandoning its pan-Islamist pretensions, separating mosque and state and restoring close relations with Israel.  It also buys an NBA team for Tehran.

4.  Iraq’s Prime Minister Nouri al Maliki declares peace on earth and good will towards Sunnis and Kurds, steps down from power and invites Iraqiyya to name a replacement.

5.  The new Islamist-run governments in Tunisia, Egypt (and yes, eventually) Libya follow the Iranian example, which convinces them separation of mosque and state are the best protection for religious freedom and will encourage religious devotion, as it seems to do in the U.S.

6.  The Saudis rise to the occasion and do likewise, making the king a constitutional monarch to boot.

7.  Bahrain does the same.  Yemen gets not only a democratic government but lots of water.

8.  Without implacable enemies, Prime Minister Netanyahu reaches a quick agreement with the Palestinians, whose state is admitted to the UN with no opposition.

9.  The Taliban see that their Islamist counterparts in Tunisia, Egypt and Libya are on to a good thing and reach a power sharing agreement with the Northern Alliance, jettisoning President Karzai and precipitating an early American withdrawal.

10.  Pakistan follows up American withdrawal and the new government in Kabul by reaching a broad-ranging agreement with India, including self-determination for Kashmir.

11.  Al Qaeda opens a resort on the Somali coast called “The Caliphate.”

12.  I retire to observe the peaceful competition between China and the United States, who compete in ping pong but do everything else collaboratively.

If Santa Claus really does exist, children, he’ll bring me those things for the 12 days of Christmas.  If he doesn’t, then…